Ten things I’m grateful for in 2014
I call 2014 “my midlife year”: it’s when I became conscious of a turning within me, a tangible movement from youth to adulthood. Last September, while facilitating an open forum on Martial Law in University of the Philippines Law Center, I expressed surprise that many students in the audience were born in the 1990s, my own college years. Having spent a decade-and-a-half away from the academe, my mind’s eye had tricked me into seeing myself as just a few years older than they were. This and experiences like it have cumulatively led me to realize that, unlike Peter Pan, I am growing older. It’s been tough facing the disappointments of youth, gaining a sense of mortality, and painting new goals for the next chapter of life- not to mention gaining 14 pounds all of a sudden- but there’s a lot of things to be grateful for this year. Here are my top ten:
- Having dinner with Her Majesty’s Ambassador.
From the library of the mountain lodge where I’m having my year-end retreat, I chose to read Anna Pasternak’s Princess In Love (1995) on the love affair between Princess Diana and cavalry officer James Hewitt. In the first chapter that describes how these star-crossed lovers met, Pasternak writes, “It was not that [Hewitt] wanted to disturb Charles and Diana, more that he wanted a speck of the magic dust that seemed to surround them for himself.” No country conjures images of kings, queens and castles better than Great Britain. So I felt touched by fairy-tale dust myself when I received a DM on Twitter from British ambassador Asif Ahmad (@AsifAAhmad) inviting me to a dinner “for social media” in his residence. This was followed by an e-mail invitation from his social secretary Ms. Vibal. During the dinner, I was impressed by HMA Ahmad’s delicious Filipino-British menu (being a Muslim, HMA Ahmad’s household uses halal ingredients) and fluency in Filipino (we conducted a SoundCloud interview almost entirely in my country’s lingua franca). Later during the year, I was again invited by Ms. Vibal to have dinner with this warm diplomat, this time to celebrate his birthday. While photographs of rock-steady royals Queen Elizabeth and Prince Andrew graced his home, the impression I got of the United Kingdom from Her Majesty’s Ambassador (HMA) was one of modernity, charity, and diversity.
2. Caring for my 97-year-old grandaunt.
Last year, my grandaunt “Tia Maring” Osorio, who lives in our multi-generational home, acquired sepsis or blood infection. When I was in high school, Tia Maring cooked my school meal everyday; in the past decade, we’ve swapped roles. Tia Maring now needs caring and attention from younger family members. In the course of treating sepsis, we met a hospice doctor who conducted home check-ups and a team of doctors, nurses and caregivers who ran a “nursing home” (where Tia Maring checked-in for a couple of days). I felt relieved when Tia Maring beat the infection and grew stronger and more lucid. She is now 98 years-old.
3. Reading books that transformed my life.
I lost my reading momentum in the last quarter of the year that I almost forgot those books I did read. I was riveted by Steve Larsson’s The Girl with a Dragon Tattoo and The Girl Who Played with Fire, Swedish crime thrillers laced with kink. David Denby’s Great Books inspired me to go on an exploration of the Western (and Eastern) classics myself: I finally finished reading Homer’s The Iliad and Murasaki Shikibu’s Tale of Genji. For spiritual “daily bread” I read Ruben Habito’s books Living Zen, Loving God and Zen and the Spiritual Exercises. Other books that moved me include: Michael Pollan’s The Botany of Desire, Steven Strogatz’s The Joy of x, Felipe Fernández-Armesto’s Civilizations, Salman Rushdie’s The Enchantress of Florence, Colin Thubron’s Shadow of the Silk Road, Ninotchka Rosca’s State of War, Augusto Villalon’s Lugar and David Richo’s How to Be an Adult in Love.
4. Undergoing family counseling.
With the help of a “third side” facilitator, my parents and I unraveled bothersome issues that have accumulated through the years- through several generations even- and grew closer in the process. I thoroughly recommend this “make better” project for every family!
5. Going on a retreat with a Filipino Zen master.
I’ve been practicing Zen since 2010, but this is the year when I attended a sesshin or retreat with Roshi Ruben Habito. A Roshi is a Zen master- what makes Ruben Roshi unique is that he is Filipino. We had our retreat in Good Shepherd Retreat House in Tagaytay. Through Ruben Roshi’s guidance, I had a kensho or enlightenment experience which he described as the “crossing of a threshold”: afterwards, I began my program of koan (“conundrum”) studies. Zen practice consists of just sitting- so simple yet so challenging!
6. Publishing a Fernando Amorsolo yearbook.
As a consultant for the Catholic school College of the Immaculate Conception (CIC) in Cabanatuan City, Nueva Ecija, I’ve been helping put together “art yearbooks” for its graduates since the mid-2000s. Each yearbook featured the works of a famous or fast-rising painter known for a distinct style, such as Carlos Valino Jr., Fernando Sena, Eman Servito, and Manolo Sicat. This year was special because the yearbook we published featured the paintings of National Artist Fernando Amorsolo. Amorsolo drew inspiration from the countryside of Central Luzon, but his paintings of idyllic bamboo groves and romantic country dances have become so iconic as to forever color our people’s vision of the Philippines.
7. Helping organize a national conference on Adult ADHD.
One of the biggest ways I “give back” to society is to promote the rights and welfare of Persons With Disability (PWDs), particularly those with Attention Deficiency and Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). I’ve served in the Board of Trustees of ADHD Society of the Philippines since 2012 and, since that time, I’ve helped form a support group for professional adults with ADHD that meets monthly. In the past, the Society’s focus has been on children with ADHD and their parents. This year, for the Society’s biennial national conference, the Board chose the landmark theme, “The ADHDult Journey: From School to the Workplace.” I’m proud of the rich program created by the Scientific Committee which I chaired and of the support of my alma mater: the event was held in UP NISMED with the offices of UP President Alfredo Pascual and UP Diliman Chancellor Michael Tan as partners. From being on the fringes, ADHD advocacy became mainstream this year.
8. Managing two human rights FGDs.
In law school, public international law was one of my favorite subjects and, after I graduated, I became a member of Amnesty International. This year, I grabbed the chance to deepen my knowledge of international law and contribute to the advancement of human rights by becoming a resource person of the UP Institute of Human Rights. My assignment is to manage a CEDAW-Based Legal Review: it’s an assessment of the Philippines’ compliance with the Convention on the Elimination of all forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW). I love the broad scope of our project: in 2015, we are going to check the Constitution, law on marriage and the family, criminal law, and civil law, among others, to see if they promote gender equality and women’s rights. Before we do this, however, we needed to ask leading advocates of women’s rights about the actual situation and concerns of women: so IHR, with Prof. Elizabeth Pangalangan as Executive Director, held two Focus Group Discussions last September and November. I’m learning how to review our laws’ compliance with international treaties and dig up issues confronting half the population.
9. Holding three writing workshops in the Senate.
My first job after law school was clerking for Supreme Court Justice Vicente Mendoza. Public service is a dimension that’s been missing in my work for a few years already. So it was with joy when during a courtesy call last August with my law classmate and now Senator Sonny Angara he invited me to join his team as a consultant. In general, this consultancy has allowed me to explore my interest in lawmaking, which is not taught in most law schools. I’ve also had the chance to conduct technical writing workshops- on speeches and media releases- for Senator Angara’s youthful and idealistic staff. During these workshops, I emphasized the importance of passion in writing- when words flow from the heart, the technical part becomes easy!
10. Spending weekends in the great outdoors.
A friend of mine (who values her privacy) dreams of trekking in Nepal someday. On some weekends this year, I got my nature-fix by coaching her during easy hikes on various mountains in Luzon. We went with different groups of friends to Pinatubo in Zambales and Taal, Pico de Loro, Maculot, and Batulao in Batangas. One special weekend, I got to experience her transcendent, Gwyneth Paltrow-style hospitality in Tali, Batangas, when she prepared the most succulent dishes (including baby eel) for our group of four. Magnifique!
